Do People Named Reginald Power Wash Their Own House?
This one's for the Reginalds of the world. The guys whose lives are so together, they only play "old man games." But what starts as a discussion on niche simulators quickly devolves into a fierce debate: are Toyota Tacomas for dads or for militias?
Join us on a journey that winds through a thoughtful meditation on the economics of big trucks and high gas prices, a delightful rabbit hole of firearm fallacies, and culminates in a profound question for our modern age: in a world full of real patios to power wash, why would one choose the simulation over the substance? It’s a conversation that's less of a straight line and more of a beautiful, meandering scenic route. Find your way to our little corner of the internet at https://todaystopic.productions. Also please comment on your favorite podcasting platform or send your comments to admin@todaystopic.productions. We want to know your thoughts. We need to know your thoughts.
Transcript
Podcast Episode Transcript: Old Man Games
Speakers:
• Speaker 1
• Speaker 2
(:(00:00:04) Speaker 2: Oh, it's in, dude. I've got like a cup of coffee in, a cup, cup and a half actually. And so I'm just, I'm ready to go. My voice is, is just, just at the edge of screech but also perfection, you know? It's right there.
(:(00:00:30) Speaker 2: Hm?
(:(00:00:32) Speaker 2: I don't know. Do you want radio names? I mean, you're...
(:(00:00:50) Speaker 2: [Laughs] Why? Why a full like, why a full name like that? And like why not...
(:(00:01:02) Speaker 2: You want to be Reginald? Reginald.
(:(00:01:06) Speaker 2: Well now you have to talk like that if you're gonna be Reginald. You have to... you now have to speak in this...
(:(00:01:17) Speaker 2: All right, let's uh, why don't we get into today's topic, which is the wonderful world of old man games.
(:(00:01:33) Speaker 2: What is the demographic? No, what is the demographic of an old, what is defines an old man game? Like what, what's the age? Do they live in a certain place? Do they live in Florida only? You know? Or is it like a, is it like a group of people that like didn't get married and are just like of a certain age and still live with their mothers in the basement?
(:(00:03:10) Speaker 2: So it's, so the old man definition isn't really actual literally an old man. It's it's a person who pays their bills on time, uh, you know, checks their mailbox every day, uh, goes to goes to work from 7:00 a.m. to 3:00 p.m. because hey, they want to have daylight at the end of their their job, you know? They want to be able to walk out in the sun for a little bit before uh, partaking in these games, right? Is that, is that the definition then?
(:(00:03:55) Speaker 2: They drive Honda Accords because they're super practical.
(:(00:04:10) Speaker 2: They drive a... They they drive the two-wheel drive F-150 because they don't need 4x4. They don't need the 4x4 feature. They just...
(:(00:04:23) Speaker 2: I don't know, man. I think Toyota, I don't know. Toyota Tacoma to me uh screams uh what is that uh Counter-Strike. Counter-Strike...
(:(00:04:40) Speaker 2: No, no, no, no. You're off with that. I'm taking the sport off. Econo, econo, econo sport truck would be a Honda Ridgeline. That would be an econo sport.
(:(00:04:49) Speaker 2: Toyota... That's why I know it's not econo because I don't know what it is, dude. If it's...
(:(00:05:00) Speaker 2: Toyota Tacoma is so practical and also econo that literally militias use it, dude. It's like the militia truck. That's how econo...
(:(00:05:16) Speaker 2: All right, never mind. This episode is no longer about old man games. It's about about screaming at each other about vehicles and what they mean. Dude, Toyota Tacoma is an economy truck. It is an economy truck.
(:(00:05:34) Speaker 2: Yeah, you do know more about trucks than me. Take five minutes. Take five minutes. These are like, this is not a military grade vehicle. Like I Toyota Tacoma, like old Toyota Tacomas from like the 2010s and stuff, they get they get sent to militias because they're cheap and...
(:(00:06:09) Speaker 2: Okay, this is not okay. Maybe I'm thinking about a different truck because I'm looking at Toyota Tacomas. This is not what I'm talking about. These look like ginorm... these are ginormous four-doors, dude. This is not what I'm talking about. I'm talking about a little two-door.
(:(00:06:25) Speaker 2: They're all four-doors.
(:(00:06:28) Speaker 2: No, look it up. That's fucking crazy. If I want, if I want to buy a new two-door truck, new...
(:(00:06:34) Speaker 2: Not even really... Okay, here's there's a Ford two-door. So they just discontinued the two-door Tacoma. Jesus Christ. A cursory look didn't, didn't reveal one. Oh my god. Because we all know that me silently looking at Google, looking through Google is great radio. Um... That is crazy, man.
(:(00:07:12) Speaker 2: I'm just not a truck purchaser.
(:(00:07:24) Speaker 2: Yeah, I can't remember the last time I've seen a two... You see four-doors all the time. They're all ginormous. Man, that's a shame. You know what's funny? Uh so, this this kind of grinds my gears like a little bit. Um, for anyone wondering, I don't like big vehicles. I think they're kind of dumb. If you have a big vehicle and you like it, you do you. But it may be working against your interests because one thing Americans like to complain about is high gas prices. So I was listening to a lecture about economics. Yep, we were, this is why we were talking about old man games at the beginning because I'm an old man game type motherfucker who listens to shit about, to who listens to stuff about economics in his free time. And they were talking about, you know, typical supply and demand type stuff. And the upshot of it was if there's more demand for an item through a complementary good, then the price for that item will go up because there's more demand. And a complementary good, the exact example was large vehicles that consume a lot of gas. If more people use large vehicles that consume gas, then the price for gas prices go up. And who are the people who complain the most about gas prices? The guys who use an absurd amount of gas with huge vehicles because they see the huge, the biggest gas bill because they consume the most because their vehicles take so much gas. But at the same time, they're contributing to high gas prices by loving these large vehicles. So they're their own worst economic enemy. They are the thing they're complaining about. And so I just thought that that was so beautifully ironic. So beautiful.
(:(00:11:52) Speaker 2: It's also just the way people work, honestly. Yeah, I don't I'm not saying that we should like electrify all commercial vehicles immediately or something. Like, yeah, man, big gas-guzzling vehicles are necessary for the modern world to run, you know. I'm not saying like, dude, your street sweeper is consuming too much gas, you're the problem. I don't know. I've I've I have mixed feelings about the whole big vehicle thing. Um...
(:(00:12:25) Speaker 2: I mean a literal street sweeper. Like a large machine that sweeps the streets.
(:(00:12:33) Speaker 2: I uh... That was lame, cut that.
(:(00:12:42) Speaker 2: Wait, gasoline-powered machine guns is a thing?
(:(00:12:45) Speaker 2: How would you power a machine gun with gasoline? Do you you turn like a motor that just makes it go round and round and shoots like a Gatling gun?
(:(00:12:54) Speaker 2: All right, going back to Google. You know, I'm using my phone so it doesn't make so much noise.
(:(00:13:22) Speaker 2: You you peaked your mic. I didn't hear anything. All I heard was "ha" and then then it cut out.
(:(00:13:39) Speaker 2: I'm getting gas operated as in gas is used in the blowback mechanism. Like, yeah, I get that. Are gas operated machine guns... Yeah, every time I see gas, I looked gasoline operated and I'm just getting, you know, gas operated because that's the most common way that, you know, an automatic weapon cycles itself.
(:(00:14:07) Speaker 2: Immediately disavow, disqualify yourself.
(:(00:14:32) Speaker 2: It means gas like, like solid, liquid, gas, gas.
(:(00:14:39) Speaker 2: Like air. Like gas, like it's gaseous. Like the hot gases from one bullet being being shot out are used to cycle the chamber and bring in the next bullet. That's what makes it automatic.
(:(00:15:02) Speaker 2: I would love to see a gasoline powered weapon. That would be excellent.
(:(00:15:28) Speaker 2: It's a natural assumption to make. Yeah, you're gas-powered, you're like yeah, it's like a generator. It's a machine. It has machine in the name.
(:(00:15:43) Speaker 2: I salute you with both hands, sir.
(:(00:15:59) Speaker 2: We should put a pin in that for a future episode about firearms and firearms ownership. I'm going to get real opinionated on that one.
(:(00:16:13) Speaker 2: You're just not a gun guy, and I think that's what makes it interesting.
(:(00:16:16) Speaker 2: I'm moderately a gun guy, you know.
(:(00:16:42) Speaker 2: Hmm. That's reasonable. Why don't we transition back into talking about what is even the topic of this anymore?
(:(00:16:59) Speaker 2: We've got at least 10 minutes of talking about machines and vehicles. We should just go back to vehicles. This is old man games was like two sentences and then we went straight into vehicles.
(:(00:17:18) Speaker 2: There is. I think there's a gunsmithing simulator old man game.
(:(00:17:24) Speaker 2: Simulators are like really popular. Maybe old man games have more of a wider reach than I thought they did.
(:(00:17:36) Speaker 2: I don't play these, but I'm going to mention some that seem like they would be old man gamey and yet aren't, like PowerWash Simulator. There's like Lawn Mowing Simulator.
(:(00:18:02) Speaker 2: Yes, that's a super popular game. Streamers play it. Popular streamers play it.
(:(00:18:37) Speaker 2: That's what I think about PowerWashing Simulator. Because it's so satisfying or something. I don't know. Like why... That is one of those things where it's such an achievable thing you can do. Why would you simulate it? Like is there like there's no like, there's no high difficulty thing to power wash, right? And the the power wash, I've seen levels of it. It's literally just like a vehicle, a building, a street sign. Is it the same? Is it the same? You're power washing them and it's just like, what? Is it because you don't have to physically move? Is that what's better about it? And what I've the argument for it I've seen is, oh, it's so satisfying. What? What is satisfying about that?
(:(00:19:22) Speaker 2: Exactly. Dude, I've seen, I've seen like TikTok and Instagram Reels accounts that are just videos of people power washing something and I consider just looking at it satisfying. But that is also why I thought why wouldn't you go and just do power washing? Like, you can get your hands on water, I'm sure. The only thing standing in your way is owning a power washer. And I mean, the power washer is maybe four times the price of the game. So maybe that's that's the hold up.
(:(00:19:53) Speaker 2: I think it's like 20 bucks. I'm going back to my phone.
(:(00:20:16) Speaker 2: It's 25 bucks.
(:(00:20:39) Speaker 2: You change nozzles and you just have to completely clean something with power... I think there's other tools there too, but it's basically just just looking, every time I see it, it's just a guy with a first-person shooter perspective power washing nozzle and he's just like scanning over something power washing stuff off. That's the game. And that's $25.
(:(00:21:07) Speaker 2: Someone... write us an email. Go to todaystopic.productions, the website, or production singular, excuse me. Is it production singular or plural?
(:(00:21:36) Speaker 2: Yes, go to todaystopic.productions or Google it and we're the we're number one for today's topic productions. We've cinched it. We've finally made it. Google has recognized our authenticity.
(:(00:21:53) Speaker 2: Yes. Go there, you know, find our email and write us an email if you like PowerWashing Simulator and tell us what's satisfying. I like different old man games where you like set up production lines and that sort of stuff. Basically, you set up fake industry. That's kind of my more niche old man game or like or niche military simulators. Those are my things.
(:(00:22:42) Speaker 2: A pressure washer is you said like $80, $100 maybe, something like that. $80, $100. A production line is tens of thousands minimum capital investment. I don't even know how much would even just a conveyor belt cost. Like that would be ridiculous. And you'd also need a place to put them.
(:(00:23:25) Speaker 2: All right, dear listener, you heard it here first. Today's Topic Water coming 2026.
(:(00:23:36) Speaker 2: So what we've learned here today is um... I love that idea, by the way. Um, if you, if you want to play a simulator game that lets you do something that's attainable in real life, just live your dream and just do it in real life. Lawn Mowing Simulator, come over to my lawn and offer to mow my lawn. You can do it. I don't hate mowing lawn, but like you can do it if it gives you pleasure. It's cool.
(:(00:24:16) Speaker 2: Imagine paying to simulate something that you can get paid to do. That's crazy to me. But see, this is the ultimate old man part. We're really going full circle because this is what an old man person would say about these old man games. I feel like these aren't old man games because an actual old man would just do the thing. These like like mow their lawn or power wash. And that's my final word.
